About a Dangerous Lady

 

Have you heard about these IF women?

That’s more a rhetorical question I guess. If your wife or significant other has come into contact with IF, the IF Gathering, or an IF table, you already know all about it. IF seems to be the exact opposite of the premise of the movie Fight Club – everyone in it loves to talk about it!

The first year that my wife went and watched the IF Gathering with a few ladies from church, I didn’t think much of it at the time. Ladies need lady time. “Sure Hun, go, I hope you have fun…”  The woman that came back though, I am not sure where she came from.

I could not put my thumb on it at first, there was just a somethin’ to her.  I would walk around our house at night weeks after IF and find her lying on the bed or the floor, face down in the bible. I would sometimes slip into the pastorly thing, and ask, “So, what are you reading about?”

She would then proceed to take me to school.

She would take the bible passages and begin gushing knowledge about how much of what the bible was talking about actually related to things happening today. How God was preparing us as His children to fight for love and unity. She talked with such passion and hope and urgency.

Honestly, in my head I was like: Oh my gosh, please let me make out with your face…

Then – this past February – came the second IF Gathering. She would cry and lose her words when talking about it all.

I started watching a bit of the IF Gathering meetings online, listening to their talks and reading the stuff they put out. I thought I would find just some chic stuff. Lots of pastels and Pinterest.

There are no words for what this is. There just are not.

Which is why I want to caution you on encouraging your wife to become involved with IF.  Especially if you are a No-Women-in-Church-Leadership type or a This-is-a-Man’s-World-Only type or a Barefoot-and-Blah-Blah-Ignorant-Blah Type, then please, whatever you do, don’t let your wife get involved in IF.  You will hate it for a number of reasons, not the least of which is that you might have to admit that the old ways are gone. Or that you might have to value her enough to support her dreams (and God will give her dreams…lots of them. They are all rad).

You might also have to come face to face with the reality that having the boys parts in the relationship and being paid more does not make you a leader.

No, being broken before your God on the floor over and over and over with your face in God’s word and your arms locked with your wife as you share your hearts and push each other to “take hold of that for which Christ Jesus has taken hold of you… (shout out to Christine Caine here!)

That.

Makes.

You.

A.

Leader.

Too many of us men have bought this lie from church culture that the man must be more successful than his wife (cause that’s in the bible…). We pass it to each generation, forgetting that God’s heart is always beating strongest for those who are told they shouldn’t have a voice.

Maybe let’s call it what it is: Condoned Laziness.

I wonder if a lot of us as dads and husbands are hiding our laziness as spiritual leaders in the language of “women submit to their husbands?”

I hear so often these defenses about how, “Well, Paul said…” When the reality is that the ideas, primarily found in Corinthians, were some of the most progressive ideas ever about a woman’s place in religion at that time. They advanced the status of women, and apparently it was such a hit that we just tried to keep them there the next several thousand years.

Guys: We must realize that a Godly woman’s success is OUR success.  Every time.

There is a saying – ‘a rising tide lifts all ships’ – and we as Christian men must embrace and support the rising tide of the Spirit’s pouring out over this movement of women.

True success as a family, living in a right relationship with God, always involves men loving their wives into the destiny that God has called them. What if God’s plan for your family was the exact opposite to how many men live? What if, when God said “I will make the man a suitable partner,” God actually meant what He said? A partner.

One of the biggest blessings of my life has been to be married to a tremendous, Jesus focused woman. With that blessing comes a solid fact: she makes me work hard to keep up…and I love it.

Sheri is an IF woman, and IF women believe in themselves and in the potential that they each bring to the world.

There is nothing as beautiful as watching my Sheri win in her own way.

It’s adding beauty upon beauty.

It’s contagious.

And to Darkness, it will always be dangerous.

 

For more, you should check this site out…

The IF Gathering